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I am a writer desperate for joys in life.

The past

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Mountain of spring cleaning

I wasn't going to post today because of the amount of homework I thought I had. To be fair though I probably should start on my networking its due in two days and one of the assignments is a midterm. I probably will since I finished that computer work in like 2 hours even though I thought it was going to take all night.  My poor G.P.A. took another hit from religion class, got a seventy on midterm. hope I can at least manage a b or I might cry.

I keep finding myself thinking about things I did in the past. I used to hang out in chat rooms when I was in high school, of course lying about my age. But the things that I said and did keep haunting me, its not that I did anything wrong but I keep picturing myself as that annoying cousin that no one wants around but tolerate for the sake of sanity. My high school days creep up on me a lot lately too. I don't know if its from years of trying to block it out or not but I definitely hate how I feel stalked by my own past. 

So I did some spring cleaning in the closet earlier this week and that led to four big loads of laundry, of which I put off until the last minute so now I regret it. Since I have no motivation to get on this networking tonight I will most likely finish cleaning the closet or at least do a big chunk of it. It's not really all that dirty it just winter clothes has to be switched out, I have to find a home for odds and ends, throw away other things... you know... that shit no one else does.


I made me a second coffee, I told myself its because I shared with Adam this morning but that's not it... I have literally no motivation to do anything lately and I have never felt it this bad. I might try taking my medicine tonight, but I think I am just going to take a few months off from therapy. I think I have found what I've been looking for, now to deal with the situation without medicine would be good.


Got my friend heather into blogging. (fidelius08.blogspot.com) 


I figured she needed the outlet more than me. I write here everyday not for views, likes or comments. I write here because I can feel my heart and head get a little less full. And who knows, my scrawl might prove useful one day, never know.


Anyways, I gotta get on this work load... have fun I guess.





1 comment:

  1. Thanks for the shout out! Sorry about the work load, not much longer till break time!

    ReplyDelete