I had another ultimatum today, I chose the latter for once. Everyone seems to expect more from me than I can offer. I have started to feel as though I am killing myself trying to get everything done. So today instead of doing one thing besides shower and make coffee I played Plants VS Zombies until my guy came home. I hadn’t even realized I had wasted six hours but then again, I guess that is what happens when you need a break.
I thought about talking about my family again but then it dawned on me that maybe one day they will read this. I don’t know why I care… it will probably be the only way that they will ever understand how I truly feel. Not that it will change anything.
They are always late for everything especially if it is important to me. I used to be involved in as many extra activities as I could just so that I didn’t have to be at home. To that extent, I think that I burnt myself out on social activities. I do not like being around people who are only out for themselves, that is one of the main things that I hate, which makes me appear anti-social. I guess that’s yet another thing I can blame on my family.
I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders as usual but at least there is a positive aspect, I have a roof over my head, food in my stomach, a guy and animals who love me. Oh, and coffee.